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>Is it possible to have a matching set of Nano S wallets each with the same assets, login, etc.?
You can have multiple devices with the same recovery phrase, pin, and 25th passphrase if you want. There is nothing that would stop you from doing this.
>Will the Nano S be reset / wiped after a certain amount of incorrect access attempts? Or can I set this up if it is not the default?
If someone enters the incorrect pin into your device 3 times it will factory reset the device and wipe the recovery phrase. This is the default setting and there is no way to change the amount of attempts you get.